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Is It Important To Be Friends With Your Spouse?

This article is all about why it’s important to be friends with your partner. 

Marriage is an institution and a partnership between spouses or couples based on trust, love, friendship, honesty, and commitment.

Many people get married because they feel like they should or see it as the next logical step after dating someone. They prepare themselves to be together forever with the same person and spend all their time together.

friends with spouse

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What Does Friendship Mean To Couples?

A couple’s friendship is a deep emotional closeness that involves mutual trust, support, and personal loyalty. This type of relationship is different from other relationships because it requires the highest level of intimacy, which is established and maintained by being open with your feelings, affections, and thoughts.

Studies show that most marriages are rooted in some form of friendship. Couples who have a healthy friendship are likely to have fewer problems in their marriage. However, the absence of friendship in marriage is dangerous for the relationship’s success and can ruin it.

Friendship does not mean agreeing with each other on every issue. It is about not hiding your true feelings toward each other. It is about supporting one another in times of trouble and celebrating each others’ successes. The friendship between spouses is what makes a marriage work overtime.

Married couples have a more satisfying relationship when they are friends compared to couples with no friendship between them.

Is It Important To Be Friends With Your Spouse?

Do you agree that it is important to be friends with your spouse? Why? Indeed there are various benefits and reasons married people should be friends with their spouses. Listed below are some of the benefits of a couples friendship.

1. Emotional Intimacy and Closeness

Research has shown that couples who are friends usually have a better marriage because they understand each other better and develop a deeper emotional closeness. In other words, the friendship allows you to “get closer” to your spouse emotionally. A person who is emotionally close to their spouse tends to have improved communication skills, leading to a more fulfilling and satisfying relationship.

The presence of friendship in marriage is likely to bring a couple closer together and allows the partners to find pleasure in each other’s company. It gives them a chance to understand their partner better and become more tolerant of each other’s needs and desires. Couples who are close to each other tend to understand each other’s needs and frustrations. They tend to forgive each other when they feel angry or frustrated.

2. Support and Encouragement

A happy relationship can easily break down if one of the partners feels neglected and ignored by the other. Unhappy spouses who have been neglected and not listened to feel often depressed. And experience a lack of self-worth or identity, which can cause them to seek comfort in inappropriate activities such as drugs or alcohol.

Research has shown some of the strongest evidence that friendship in marriage helps couples develop a good relationship. Couples are more likely to obtain an extramarital affair or divorce if they are not accepted and supported by their spouses.

Similarly, couples who have friendship as part of their relationship tend to be less troubled with relationships and feel less prone to cheating on each other.

3. Trust Building

It is a well-known fact that when a couple becomes friends, they form an emotional bond which gives them the trust they need to share information and secrets. They tend to be more open with each other and share their feelings and opinions.

A couple’s friendship could be an important factor for long-term relationship success because it develops emotional closeness, which helps improve communication skills and encourage sharing of feelings. It is easier for friends to express their feelings than people who are not friends.

Couples who have friendships in their marriage usually find it easier and more fun to spend time together. They support and help each other do daily activities – from shopping, washing the dishes, going shopping, cleaning, and any activity involving both partners.

4. Personal Loyalty

Friendship within marriage is based on the ability of couples to discuss and solve problems together, even if that means dealing with difficult topics like infidelity, addiction, or betrayal. People who are friends are likely to be more loyal than people who are not friends. If a couple can successfully solve their problems and disagreements by themselves, they will feel more satisfied with the relationship and experience less anxiety.

5. Having Someone to Share Life With

The friendship that couples grow within their marriage is usually the main person they can rely on in times of trouble and comfort each other. When a couple’s friendship becomes deeper, they tend to see each other as someone to share their problems, triumphs, joys, and sorrows. However, these moments are often only shared within a crisis or during difficult times. This can weaken their relationship over time.

6. Personal Growth and Development

Friendship can help each partner to become a better person because it makes couples more tolerant, compassionate, understanding, and supportive of one another. Partners who are friends usually have greater self-confidence and are more kind-hearted. Additionally, research has shown that the presence of friendship in marriage tends to make couples more satisfied with their lives and marriage.

Friendship doesn’t have to be limited to one’s spouse. Friends can also come from various sources; some examples are friends of family members, schoolmates, workmates, and neighbors. Some people only have one or two close friends, although some people are lucky to have many close friends they can talk to.

couples friendship

Tips to strengthen friendship for a healthy marriage

Being friends with your spouse is very crucial. Therefore, you should find tips that can strengthen your friendship with your better half. Below are some tips that will make your friendship with them stronger.

Learn to Share and Care for Each Other

The first thing to understand is that you must share each other’s life for your marriage to be healthy. You should also have a good and understanding relationship with each other.

Sometimes, partners lean more on emotional or mental comfort from their friends, which often causes problems in their marriages and family life. The solution to this is to open up to each other about life to build emotional and mental comfort in the marriage. 

Don't Keep Secrets From Each Other

Secrets are known to break marriage and family life apart. You should not keep secrets from each other because secrets are very dangerous and can lead your marriage to unnecessary problems. Often, you will have a split in your heart, and it is not only one partner who will feel this but also your partner. Therefore, you should have a baseline in the relationship to refrain from keeping secrets, unless it’s related to a present (ie. Birthday, holiday, anniversary, etc.).

Share About Life and Stressors

A marriage life needs to be full of trust and sharing, especially when both the spouses are involved in different activities that cause mental stress. In many cases, when caring for a family one partner may lead childcare, activities, and tending to the home while the other partner may be focused on work. It can feel like two ships passing in the night. It’s important to carve out time to talk about life and the current stressors each partner is feeling. 

Avoid Talking Negative About Your Partner to Others

Talking negatively about your partner to other people can influence how others may view your partner. It can be easy to list off what’s lacking in the relationship, how they may be letting you down, etc. our brains are wired to look for what’s not going well. While it can feel like a stress reliever, often your family or friends are put in an awkward position of trying to support you, which may mean not supporting the marriage as a whole. 

If you need a place to vent, enlist the support of a therapist to talk more about it. 

Don't Do Things Which Will Cause More Problems In Your Marriage

You must avoid doing things that will cause more problems in your marriage, especially when it comes to having affairs, especially if there are certain people that you don’t want to do such things with. If you do this, it could be very detrimental to your marriage because it leads to mental and emotional harm, destroys any trust that has been built, and loss of a relationship (for some partners). 

If you are considering an affair, seek out the assistance of a trained couples therapist to help redirect the focus in your relationship.

Finally, you can now see how important having a friendship with your spouse is, because if you don’t have a good friendship with them, there are high chances that your marriage life will not be healthy.

Therefore, do whatever it takes to strengthen your friendship with your partner to keep your marriage lively. 

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