13 Ways to Be a Team with Your Spouse

This article is all about what makes a couple a good team.

Marriage is a fusion and not only a union. The moment you exchange your vows, it’s apparent that you both won’t be the same again, perhaps ever. That means taking your partner for life may be a ride through torrents and amusements. It takes a lot to stick together and may sometimes require you to make a few sacrifices.

But one thing is for sure – working as a team through the adversity and good times is the key to cruising through it all.

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Teamwork means being together not just physically but mentally and emotionally. It involves sharing, giving, forgiving, and tolerating your spouse, complementing their weakness and making them stronger. Remember, romance sometimes fades, the spark ends, and you may not consistently experience your youthful excitement throughout the years.

Nonetheless, the strong cohesion and partnership will work the trick, frequently saving your marriage at its low. Therefore, this article explains how best you can be a team with your spouse.

1. Communicate Exhaustively

Think about your union retrospectively; the first time you met, you had a conversation. And perhaps, something about your spouse made you think you hit the jackpot. Forget about the looks and the killer smile, and think about what your spouse said to hook you. They communicated, and you listened and agreed. Maybe it’s how they laid the blueprint for their lives ahead, the plans and prospects of finding their better half.

The fact that they communicated gave you two a chance to be together and go strong in marriage to date. Now, carry on with the spirit. Communicate exhaustively and air out your needs, desires, and goals. Having engaging and constructive conversations is the key to understanding watch. Marriage can be a massive ship for you to sail without coordinating correctly. And if you fail to communicate, there’s a minimal chance you’ll forge ahead.

2. Establish Your Roles and Responsibilities


Knowing your roles demarcates the boundaries on the functional capacities, allowing for coordination. Earlier in your lives together, life is always simple to chew, and everything seems pretty straightforward. But with time, responsibilities start kicking in, you get your kids, and the duties bulge. In the contemporary world, both spouses take on white-collar jobs, which means a steady income. Therefore, there’s a need to split up the responsibilities and facilitate things.

Communicate the roles and let them be clear. Decide who pays the kids’ school fees or pays the car insurance. If possible, make the parts fair according to the capacity of each. Never let your spouse carry a burden they can’t cope with since that invites low whines. And if you choose the lion’s share of the responsibilities, ensure that you’re okay with them and that it doesn’t overwhelm you. That way, it’s pretty simple fostering some teamwork. 

3. Anticipate Your Moves Together

Never let your spouse take the first move alone. Instead, make it your habit of hopping with them forward after deciding what’s suitable for you together. Of course, you’ll need to take turns following the leader, and in such a case, it’d be either of you. However, ensure that you agree on the best terms together after anticipating the move and deciding where you need to hop.

Making concerted decisions helps you predict and plan for the future without a hitch. That way, nothing is coming out of the blue that may catch you unaware since you’ll have the blueprint to navigate through. If you let your spouse take the lead, ensure that they have your full support, and they need to worry about nothing except focusing ahead.

4. Nothing but Trust for You Both

You should pin trust on every heart wall and let it guide you forward. There’s no chance that you’ll taste victory in marriage if you don’t trust your partner. And indeed, the chances of working together and forging ahead would only be a far cry. If you both have a few incompatible differences, ensure that you iron them out early in your marriage before they escalate in the future.

Every relationship uses trust as a building foundation, a steady rock to build the skyscrapers. And if trust is weak, there’s no chance of reaching and touching the skies. And while trust is challenging to find, sometimes, blind faith can help. You need to believe in your spouse, trust them and work together to build a more robust marriage. 

5. Savor the Little Wins Together

Even the little wins count, and it doesn’t matter how impactful they are to your marriage. Never take the tinier W’s for granted since they’re what motivate you to achieve the more important things. Ensure that you carry a bottle of champagne home after securing the long-awaited job. Or, let your partner feel uniquely special after managing to register the grocery shop successfully.

In an imperfect world, never expect your spouse to be a superhuman to bring in significant wins. If they do, then pull up a celebration worth the victory. However, after achieving the little things, a pat on the back works the trick. It makes your spouse feel appreciated and recognized. No effort is insignificant in marriage and as long as it moves you forward, it gives you the motivation to stick together and achieve the bigger goals.

6. Value Each Other's Time

The time for each other is of massive significance in marriage. You need to be present for your spouse whenever they need you, in good and bad times. Of course, you’re all busy working from 8 to 5. Or maybe, the business you both started takes a considerable chunk of time. At the end of the day, if you don’t have time for others to catch up and unwind, it’d all be a world-goose chase.

Getting time for each other helps a notch since it gives you time to cool down the steam. You both have a common goal to accomplish, but if it means stealing away your time, there’s no point in chasing. Having sufficient time together helps you communicate and work out the problem areas. It gives you the chance to make clear resolutions and guarantees an extra step forward.

7. Don't Define Winners – Or Losers

Marriage isn’t a competition, and there are no winners or losers. Maybe you may have different roles to play, but there shouldn’t be any boundaries defining what each of you needs to do. Remember, you’re a team, which means complementing each other and realizing your goals together. And if any of you fails to reach a mile, it’s prudent to understand that no one wins or loses in that case.

While you shouldn’t aim at bagging the Ls, sometimes it becomes inevitable. If so, you need to pick up the pieces and build from scratch. Creating a neutral ground to step into after a win or loss levels things, allowing you to both celebrate or find a way to forge forward if need be. Never define the winner or loser since it attracts lousy energy and unnecessary competition, compromising the teamwork spirit.

8. Inspire One Another

The road to marriage isn’t a walk in the park. And sticking and working together means inspiring and encouraging one another every step. The little encouraging words you tell your spouse go an extra mile into motivating them. That helps if they are down since it lets your spouse know that they have your unwavering support through their adversity.

You’ll cruise low sometimes, and as the doctrine of marriage, that’s pretty generic. But it takes inspiration and an uplifting to raise from the ashes. If your spouse finds the peace and inspiration from you, it’ll urge them to forge ahead with whatever you both want to accomplish in marriage. Your vote of confidence matters a lot, especially when working together as a team. 

9. Define Your Rules, And Play by Them

Every couple has a set of matrimonial rules they follow. These rules are self-defined and almost come out of intuition. Perhaps, the chemistry may dictate them, and they’d pop in naturally as principles you both adhere to. But the bottom line is that you must have a few rules to keep things in check. However, don’t make them too punitive and aggravating. That could pick stuff off the line and constrain you.

If anything, sit your spouse down and have a more profound conversation about setting the house in order. Define what you should do and what you shouldn’t. If it’s arguing, ensure that you put a few restrictions that’d prevent you from crossing the line. Perhaps, it could be restraining from blame games, not taking cheap shots, or unearthing the past in defense. However, don’t make the rules too stringent and overly confining.

10. Have an Exit Plan for Everything

Having an exit plan for everything offers you an alternative to seamlessly getting out of dire situations. As a team of two, there’s virtually nothing you can’t accomplish together. However, never leave anything to chance since you might get gripped into challenging situations coming out of the blue. You don’t want to end up with less or no options to turn to.

To work as a team and guarantee high success in everything, ensure that you have a viable and working plan B. You have a secluded savings kit to put your financial boat in balance. Maybe you could also start a business as a cushion for job loss because you’re never sure what could happen. Having a viable plan helps you with a solution and provides an option to run to.

11. Don't Infuse "I" In Your Team

There’s never an “I” in a team, and if you want to hold it together, don’t keep things under wraps. Be open to your spouse and keep them in the loop in everything you do. Going separate ways and making decisions can impact your relationship and compromise your marriage.

You don’t need to be the sole voice in everything, but letting your spouse have a say in making crucial decisions builds a sense of unity. Working as a team requires a voice in unison, and that won’t ensue if you take your spouse only as a second and not a side-by-side partner. Never be selfless but think more about whom you’re sharing a life with. Make their voice and opinions matter since that’s technically the only way you’ll forge ahead as a team.

12. Be Honest and Vulnerable

Don’t act too tough to admit to your mistakes before your partner. Remember, you’re together for a reason, which means complementing each other’s weaknesses. You’re never too strong not to be vulnerable to do a thing or two wrong. And since you’re both humans, it’s best to be honest, and let it out.

Be quick in admitting to making a mistake and let your spouse understand your reasons. Please don’t wait for them to find out by themselves and start asking you questions. That breaks the trust you’ve built and compromises your union. Besides, it creates negative energy and steadily eats away your relationship’s fabric. In the end, it culminates in painful disengagements and divorces you never pictured before.

13. Learn to Forgive and Let Go

Learning to forgive and forget is the key to building a more robust team with your spouse. And although it all depends on the gravity of the mistakes, forgiving isn’t always far-fetched. You must understand that having ill feelings towards your spouse intoxicates your relationship and you’d hardly team up and see your way ahead. Hence letting it out and going is your best bet at making things work.

As soon as you realize you made a mistake, it would help if you asked for forgiveness almost immediately. Don’t downplay your mistakes, hoping that the situation blows over. Instead, let your spouse know and humbly ask for their forgiveness. 

Building a team in a relationship isn’t rocket science but a process that requires understanding, patience, and resilience. As soon as you exchange your vows, it signifies more than a union – a fusion – meaning that you must work together as a team and realize your couple goals.

If anything, don’t only make your partner your best friend but a worthy teammate for a healthier and more robust marriage.

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